By Alan Bentley

It takes work getting to know your audience. Although we communicate much more effectively than ever before, my wife and I still have the occasional misunderstanding or disagreement. Typically, it comes down to the fact that we didn'’t remember, acknowledge or otherwise respect each other before we opened our mouths.

I'’m going to try and save you that trouble by helping you get to know your man and your audience a little better. Next time you'’re ready to make a suggestion, pose a reminder or even just mention something in passing don'’t let yourself be surprised by your man’’s reaction. Instead, ask yourself the questions like the ones that follow.

Has he just walked through the door at the end of the day?

Timing can be the key to unlocking a lot of success in life. Something said at the wrong time can cause you all kinds of trouble, while just the right words at just the right time can mean everything in the world to your guy. So before you make a comment or ask a question, make sure the timing is right. The first thing in the morning, the last thing at night, etc., these are not always copasetic times to ask your man to take out the trash or find that Wal-Mart receipt from three months ago.

Am I saying something out of context, i.e. does it pertain to the conversation we'’re actually having?

Men often complain that a comment or question just came out of nowhere. What they'’re really saying is that their wife or girlfriend said something out of context. For instance, if you'’re talking about where to eat dinner one minute and then reminding him about something he said about getting married the next, well, that’’s out of context and will likely confuse your man. Confusion is never good for any relationship.
Is he wearing a face that says don'’t start trouble?

I am not suggesting with this list that you walk on eggshells around your man or that his moods are more important and/or valuable than yours. Both halves of a couple should feel comfortable about speaking their minds freely, at any time. All I'’m saying is that the better you know your audience, the better result you'’ll get from what you'’re saying.

Have I already asked him this question before?

In our busy lives, we all have a tendency to repeat ourselves. But repeating yourself to your man is like the mother who keeps telling her unruly child to stop over and over again; after the first few times, when there are no consequences, the very word loses its meaning.

Last but not least, is he hungry or tired?

Believe it or not, many arguments or miscommunications start because of low blood sugar! My wife jokingly says she always remembers to feed me before she brings up something really important.

About The Author

Alan Bentley, God’’s gift to female/male communication, helps single women across the country unravel mysteries of the male mind helping improve their relationships with men they love. To discover how you can crack the guy code, go to http://www.cracktheguycode.com or email alan@cracktheguycode.com